Wednesday, September 3, 2008

SHORT CIRCUIT

...and I'm not talking about the movie.  Although....

So I was driving down Silverlake Boulevard today and some BEEYATCH nearly pulled right into the side of my car.  (*NOTE: This wouldn't be the first time this has happened to me here in L.A.)  As I veered into oncoming traffic to avoid being hit, I immediately slammed on my horn.  The only problem was there was no horn.  Nothing.  Just the sweet sounds of Tony Orlando pumping out of my kickin' sound system. 

I then carted my fine ass over to Auto Zone to purchase a new #15 fuse for the "horn" section.  After inserting the male end into the female end, I was ready to test out the goods.  However, again...NO F#&%in' HORN!  

I ask you...WHAT THE FRAK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITHOUT A HORN IN L.A.?!!!?!  

Sure, I can flip off the offending douchebags.  I can even hold the phone up to my ear to pretend I am calling the police.  (No, wait, I can't even do that with this new earpiece only crap).  I can roll down my window and yell at the morons, but then I risk having something thrown at my mug.  

So what do I do?  Do I just sit back and let these SHIT-AY drivers hit me?  My brother suggested I get a blow-horn and dig into that when the occasion calls for it.  Not a bad idea, but with my luck it will be on the back sill with my box of tissue where I can't reach.  

Perhaps it's simply time to purchase a gun.

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